January 2010
77 posts
WatchWhat English Sounds Like to Foreigners
Thanks Italy!
December 2009
75 posts
“A former New Jersey police officer accused of having a moonlight tryst with a group of cows will not be facing animal cruelty charges after all, after a grand jury couldn’t determine whether the cattle consented to the apparent one night stand.”
This seems to set a rather odd legal precedent.
Patrick Stewart is awarded a Knighthood →
Experiments (Julia)
Envision this:
I am your roommate. Sounds fun, non? But it would be irritating in a way that many mortals can’t imagine.
You are asleep. You begin to awaken. You feel warm and safe. But lo! Something is amiss. There is …stickyness…on your torso. Upon further inspection, you discover that you have a pie gently, yet firmly, pressed against your bare skin.
It is a flavour of pie you are...
40 Things That Were Popular At the Beginning of... →
kayfabe:
(via noahkai:mykicks)
Words of the Day: Eroteme/Ecphoneme
Definitions:
-Eroteme:: A symbol, ?, comprising a curve and a dot below, signifying the end of a sentence that is a question. Also known as a “question mark.”
-Ecphoneme: A symbol, !, comprising a line and a dot below, signifying the end of a sentence that is an exclamation. Also known as an “exclamation mark.”
Julia: Hey jerk-face (ecphoneme)
Bryan: Oh hey. How’s it...
Definitions
Highlighters are about wasting time on decoration, rather than actually working. They are like foreplay. Forever.
Foreplay is about starting the engines of you and your collaborator, if you were both old cars. You must have foreplay, as the engine cannot do it all on its own. You mustn’t be too extensive, or too hasty or the car goes “pfut”.
A car is a form of transportation. There are new...
Ha, sucks to be you, audience
So, one of my dirtier secrets is that as a “yout”, I dabbled in creative writing. Not just at home (we were all fifteen once), but I actually took classes in university. These classes were …. hilarious. Taught by a burnt-out surfer who published one book (about surfing), the only way to get a grade was to read your work and comment on the work of others. Which is, obviously,...
Instructions on How to Become Emperor of China
Begin by guiding your actions in this life, so that you will be born into the ruling dynasty in the next.
Or, begin by guiding your actions in this life, so that your troops are loyal to you, not the emperor and overthrow the ruling dynasty, preferably killing all relatives, advisors and attendants that may harbour unjust feelings towards your glorious new regime of doom. I mean, of light.
Be...
Stitches by David Small
“Sometimes I think children are the worst people alive.”
– Chuck Klosterman
The Dutch Presents: MIND CONTROL! (aka marginal...
I, for one, feel that making people do what you want (albeit in aggregate) is awesome. And while annoying to pay, taxation can generate aggregate behavioural change in a citizenry. So, hooray for taxes. Or at least the interesting ones.
Basically, the idea is that people respond to price incentives. While not universally true, it does work in a number of areas to different degrees. A measure of...
Footy footy footy footy footy footy footy footy... →
World Cup 2010!
-Dutch
John Oliver and Andy Zaltzman being amazing news,... →
Listen! Amazing!
Admittedly Dooshy Avatar Rant, but some gems...
I just saw the trailer for Avatar.
Actually I saw it two weeks ago and delayed writing this but I haven’t seen it yet so the initial trailer reactions still stand. I guess I’ll say it, that film is Fern Gully. Billions of dollars, piles of hype, and it is almost literally fern gully. I can say this with confidence because the trailer showed every single significant plot point in a...
Green Shoppers More Likely To Cheat, Moral People...
“If buying an organic apple instead of one caked in pesticides eases your conscience, there’s a good chance that your next ethical decision might not be a good one.
According to the results of a University of Toronto study, participants who assigned more social value to ‘green’ shopping were more likely to cheat and steal in subsequent tests than those with less stringent...
Stereotyping People by Their Favorite Author
J.D. Salinger - Kids who don’t fit in (duh).
Stephenie Meyer - People who type like this: OMG. Mah fAvvv <3 <3.
J.K. Rowling - Smart geeks.
Jack Kerouac - Umphrey’s McGee fans.
Jeffrey Eugenides - Girls who didn’t get enough drama when they were younger.
Lauren Weisberger - Girls who can’t read. Or think.
Jonathan Safran Foer - 30somethings who were cool when they were 20something.
...
Word of the Day: Aesthete
Aesthete
Definition: One who obsessively pursues or admires beauty, as in art or nature, to the indifference of practical matters.
Bryan: Look at my new chair! Brown-leather-chaise-longue. Ecstasy.
Julia: Kick-ass. Let’s test this bad boy out.
Bryan: What the fuck are you doing.
Julia: <sitting in chair> Um. Like, sitting in this chair?
Bryan: Imma count to three....
Texts From Billings
Bryan
2009-12-12 5:01 PM
Hahaha Call Dutch. I’m at
the gym and he’s not
answering texts.
Billings
2009-12-12 5:02 PM
He’s got his like other
plans with coworkers from
What i got last night
You’re tech meeting up
with him
And are you working your
glutes? Is your ass gonna
be all tight and firm if I
grab it later? How ya
gonna do standing 69 if ya
wear yourself out?
...
